Tag Archives: humor

cARtOONDdAY: “lOVE IN THE lIBARARY”

But the most difficult part of all was deciding which he loved more.

But the most difficult part of all was deciding which he loved more.

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Filed under 2017, cartoon by author, CarToonsday

Monday morning writing joke: “The word made flesh”

Four brothers left home for college, and they became successful doctors and lawyers.

One evening, they chatted after having dinner together. They discussed the 95th birthday gifts they were able to give their elderly mother who moved to Florida.

The first said, “You know I had a big house built for Mama.”

The second said, “And I had a large theater built in the house.”

The third said, “And I had my Mercedes dealer deliver an SL600 to her.”

The fourth said, “You know how Mama loved reading the Bible and you know she can’t read anymore because she can’t see very well. I met this preacher who told me about a parrot who could recite the entire Bible. It took ten preachers almost 8 years to teach him. I had to pledge to contribute $50,000 a year for five years to the church, but it was worth it Mama only has to name the chapter and verse, and the parrot will recite it.”

The other brothers were impressed. After the celebration Mama sent out her “Thank You” notes.

She wrote: Milton, the house you built is so huge that I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house. Thanks anyway.”

“Marvin, I am too old to travel. I stay home; I have my groceries delivered, so I never use the Mercedes. The thought was good. Thanks.”

“Michael, you gave me an expensive theater with Dolby sound and it can hold 50 people, but all of my friends are dead, I’ve lost my hearing, and I’m nearly blind. I’ll never use it. Thank you for the gesture just the same.”

“Dearest Melvin, you were the only son to have the good sense to give a little thought to your gift. The chicken was delicious Thank you so much.”

Love, Mama

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Filed under 2017, Monday morning writing joke

“My Bowling Green”

owling-100dpi_6x11_4c_0615-copyIt’s hard being Bowling Green, /
To see the things I have seen, /
Bodies piled high as friends lean /
Upon the bars in my Bowling Green. /

The reckless came to town one day, /
Said we had all gone away, /
Gone away, no more to say /
In this place now unseen, called my Bowling Green. /

Jihadist from a foreign land /
Had come and massacred us so grand, /
Wiped us all out where we stand. /
O’ the tragedy was so mean deep in my Bowling Green. /

They say none of us were spared, /
That these terrorist did not care. /
We were lost to great despair /
That day in memory serpentine in my Bowling Green. /

The media did not take note. /
Little was said and less was wrote. /
We were left with but just a sad note, /
A sad note it would seem about my Bowling Green. /

Fredrick Douglass had nothing to say. /
Nor Oliver Wendell Douglas about that day /
When Green Acres were turned red with dismay /
O’ that sad, mean, vile scene in my Bowling Green. /

We cannot remember what we do not know, /
Though alternative facts tell us so, /
That lies and lives come and go. /
There is little we can now glean from my Bowling Green. /

They erected a sign to the non-event /
And many a word has long been spent /
In song and poem and prose unbent /
To say what can’t be seen of the wrongs in my Bowling Green. /

It’s hard being Bowling Green, /
To see the things I have seen, /
Bodies piled high as friends lean /
Upon the bars in my Bowling Green.

–photo and poem by David E. Booker

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Filed under 2017, photo by David E. Booker, poetry by author, political humor

Monday (morning) writing joke: “Subject addressed”

There once was a quirky writer from Nice /
Who wore clothes only made from fleece. /
He visited friends around France /
In his polyester-type pants. /
Their plastic tongues wagged without cease.

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Filed under 2017, Monday morning writing joke, poetry by author

cARtOONSdAY: “cASE lOGIC 22: oPEN aND sHUT”

And causing the pages to stick shut. Period.

And causing the pages to stick shut. Period.

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Filed under 2017, cartoon by author, CarToonsday

cARtOONSdAY: “cASE lOGIC 21: dUST uP”

"Oh NO!" the head comma said, realizing this was a turning point.

“Oh NO!” the head comma said, realizing this was a turning point.

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Filed under 2016, cartoon by author, CarToonsday

Photo finish Friday: “Jim’s where?”

"He went where?"

“He went where?”

Huck and Tom sat on a bridge fence overlooking a river. They were older now, and somewhat wiser, but still sometimes lost in the details of life.

“You think Jim would like to see this river?” Tom asked.

“I think he was a-sick of rivers after that adventure a few years back. I heard that when the raftin’ was all over, and the adventurin’ out in the Territories was done, ol’ Jim hitched himself up to politics and did right well up there in Washington.”

Tom thought about it for a moment. “How look he been there?”

“I hear it’s been about eight years.”

“Eight? Well, that might just be enough to make him mean.”

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Filed under 2016, Photo by Beth Booker, Photo Finish Friday