Author Archives: debooker

About debooker

A brief (and somewhat ambiguous) biography. One hundred words, more or less, about David Booker might include the following: though lost in the cosmos without a compass, he has nonetheless managed to find his way into middle age. As to what he will do now that he is there is still a matter of speculation. He often seeks guidance from his youthful daughter as he alternately approaches and retreats from the slow expansion of his waistline and the slow collapse of Western Civilization as he knows it. He hopes the two will reach a libration (or libation) point and he will creep into old age with some dignity and clothes intact.

Haiku to you Thursday: “Fall wind”

The wind and the truth /

whirl with autumn’s brittle edge. /

Leaves and love are brown.

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Photo finish Friday: “Nobody told me”

What?? Who said I couldn’t kill the Wookie?

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Haiku to you Thursday: “Honk, if you”

Honk if you love _____ /

echoes the faded, empty /

bumper sticker heart.

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Monday morning writing joke: “The final frontier”

Two writers are working in a room.

The would-be mystery writer keeps scratching her head and staring at her screen as she decides what should happen next.

The struggling science fiction writer repeatedly strikes his computer keyboard with his thumb.

Finally, she looks up and asks: “What are you doing?”

“I keep hitting the space bar,” the guy says, “but I’m still here on Earth.”

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Photo finish Friday: “Making the cut”

Banana Bread and knife.

Diana had never liked banana bread. Hated it, actually. But there lay four loaves on the cooling wire. Thomas, her out-of-work husband, had made it. He had sent her a text saying he had a surprise for her. Well, she had a surprise for him. Eleven years of marriage and the damn fool didn’t know how she felt about banana bread. She tried to find some way to be pleased, to show that she approved of his taking some initiative, but she found it hard. It had been an extremely difficult day at work, a day where she felt in her very bones that she wanted to quit, but she couldn’t, and she knew her boss knew that and that was why he was making it hell for her.

Diana paused for a minute. Her boss liked banana bread, raved about it, particularly if it was homemade. She would take a loaf to him. One of the small ones, so it would seem like she was baking it just for him, which was what she wanted the bastard to believe. Plus, she only wanted him to eat it. Now, if she could only find…

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Haiku to you Thursday: “Puddles”

Puddles in the rain. /

Transitory friendships. /

Earth absorbs them all.

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Writing tip Wednesday: “Humor Poetry Contest”

Wergle Flomp Humor Poetry Contest (no fee)

Ends on April 1, 2018

Submit one humor poem, up to 250 lines. First prize of $1,000 and second prize of $250. Ten Honorable Mentions will receive $100 each. The top 12 entries will be published online. There is no fee to enter. Judge: Jendi Reiter, assisted by Lauren Singer.

In addition to English, your poem may contain inspired gibberish. You may submit published or unpublished work. Please omit your name from your entries. We prefer 12-point type or larger. Please avoid fancy, hard-to-read fonts.

Please submit only one poem to this contest.

Source and further details: https://winningwriters.submittable.com/submit/58279/wergle-flomp-humor-poetry-contest-no-fee

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