There once was a gossip columnist extraordinaire /
Who told stories that weren’t even there. /
If you called him a liar /
He’d only pile it on higher, /
Because he had a few lies to spare.
A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. “But why,” they asked, as they moved. “Because,” he said, “I can’t stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.”