I nuzzle your neck /
and plant moments of passion /
in folds of warm flesh.
Recently, in my hometown of Knoxville, TN, a 23-year-old woman by the name of Evelyn Grace Radford, supposedly fortified by wine and fit of limb and wind, swam not the English Channel, but the more modest Fort Loudoun Lake (sometimes referred to as Fort Loudoun Embayment. Named for an Englishman of noble lineage who never saw it and probably cared not a whit about it).
To add daring to her do, she did so in the dark of night and in no more than her bra and panties. If you do not believe me, you can read the article below or follow the link for the full story, assuming you are not stopped by some pay wall. She successfully swam the Lake, Embayment (sometimes also called the Tennessee River because this were the River starts), but was greeted by police and rescue squad personnel who had been called to the scene for fear that she had fallen in and might be drowning.
The event inspired the following modest poetic verse:
There once was a lady named Grace /
Who did the breast stroke all out-of-place. /
She swam the river with flair /
Scantily in her underwear. /
Alas, the newspaper showed only her face.
KNOXVILLE — A 23-year-old Knoxville woman told police late Monday night she “just wanted to swim” after making her way across Fort Loudoun Lake wearing only a bra and panties.
Evelyn Grace Radford’s near-midnight jump into the water at Volunteer Landing, however, prompted calls of a drowning to authorities who launched boats to rescue the scantily clad woman.
Her actions also prompted charges of disorderly conduct and public intoxication, records show.
Authorities were alerted at 11:54 p.m. that an intoxicated woman had stripped down to her basic clothing and jumped into the water and was swimming to the south shore, according to Knoxville Police Department Sgt. Scott Coffey.
“She left her clothing with her boyfriend at Volunteer Landing and he abruptly left the area,” Coffey said. “The witnesses indicated they believed the couple were in an argument prior to her jumping in the water.”
For the rest of the story: http://www.knoxnews.com/news/watchful-eye/midnight-swim-nets-charges-against-scantily-clad-woman_69968857